Good Leaders Are Quick To Admit When They Are Wrong.

The tension was palpable.

I got angry at one of my subordinates because of their angry attitude toward me for something I asked him to do. My mother’s advice: "Two wrongs don't make a right" echoed through my skull.

I knew what I had to do but I didn’t want to do it.

My subordinate was without question in the wrong. He had blown up at me first. I had asked him to do something well within his job description and he had lost it on me.

The problem was, I had lost my cool with him as well. I was tired of his arguments and fighting him just to get him to do what I was well within my right as his manager to ask of him. Tired of being challenged at every turn by someone who had barely a year under his belt compared to my six. Tired of fighting someone over what was ultimately going to be good for him.

Tired and stressed I let him have it.

Outbursts of anger never solve anything. But in the moment it can feel like just the release we think we want.

Even though I was right in what I was asking him to do and with what authority I had over him to ask it. I handled the situation wrong. And for that reason alone I needed to admit that I handled it wrong to him.

I needed to do it not only to (hopefully) clear the air between us and the tension in the room. But I also needed to lead him well.

Good leaders don’t have everything put together. They do not have everything figured out and don’t always handle everything perfectly. But they do try to resolve on doing the right thing, even if it means taking one square on the chin.

A bit later I pulled the subordinate into an empty conference room and asked him to forgive me for blowing up on him.

His response shocked me.

He accepted my apology and proceeded to ask for my forgiveness for his attitude as well.

To be clear, up to the very moment I opened my mouth and said the words, I did not want to ask forgiveness for my actions. I felt justified up to that point for my actions because of his actions toward me.

But I knew I was wrong. I knew the better way forward was owning my mistakes, even if it meant being the first to apologize.

I learned that being the first to admit wrong has an incredibly powerful impact on those you are attempting to lead. Leadership is more than just leading people on some mission it’s demonstrating the right way to act while you’re on that mission.

Good leaders are quick to admit when they are wrong.